February 29, 2008
So…I’m sitting here on a gray, windy day here in Ireland, ironing my husbands shirts and I’m thinking…”gosh, where would I be if I weren’t here?”
I started my day as I usually do, waking up, joking around with my absolutely AWESOME husband (i’d like to say we’re silliest in the morning, but it’s usually just a precursor to what’s to come later in the evening…so fun!). I made myself my usual breakfast, one egg white with methodically measured snippets of yolk, a piece of perfectly toasted “brown wholemeal bread” and my small dose of grapefruit juice accompanied by my lovely cup of tea with milk. Yes, I eat that every morning. I lurrrv it. Seriously. It’s my staple and makes me happy, but really Ireland is the cause of this happiness not the other way around…it’s not like I’ve loved this breakfast my whole life and, “boy am I lucky to be eating it in Ireland.” No…Ireland is the cause of this fantastically fabulous breakfast. I will explain…
First…I met my husband 9 months before moving here. He’s the most fantastically fabulous, wonderful-iscious man I’ve ever known. Seriously, if you’ve met him, you know. He’s just puurrrfect for me, and we together are better than a chunky peanut butter and jelly sandwich on toast. We are that puuurfect cup of tea, or that well deserved ice cold Corona with lime on a hot LA day. So, 9 months before I moved here, we met. We met on September 11 no less. The most horrible day commemorated in history, is now ingrained in my brain as the best day of my life. That was our first date.
We initially met on Match.com and from there emailed, and talked on the phone before meeting on that fateful day. I remember that I was on the phone with my friend Jessie as I drove up to the restaurant. As I so often did, I would show up a tad late for these dates, hoping the guy would be standing outside the restaurant so I could size him up before I even met him face to face. I remember driving by and thinking…”wow, he’s cute!” I even said that to my friend on the phone. He was cute! When we finally met face to face, he was the sweetest, most charming, most open guy I’d ever met and he had braces! Seriously, cute! He was Swedish, that I knew, but LA hadn’t soured his open nature or wonderfully innocent sense of humour. He wasn’t tainted. He was amazing and who knew that existed on Match.com?
So…time passed, we fell into each other’s lives and quickly got married on April 1st, yes April Fools! It’s my favorite holiday aside from Halloween, and now it’s my wedding anniversary, Bonus! Green card issues, and moving to Ireland aside…I wouldn’t have had it any other way. Over the past two years, I have looked back on the whole thing and I’ve definitely wished that there was more festivity following our vows, but aside from that, our backyard April Fools wedding, planed in 3 weeks, was perfect. I don’t know how well I would’ve dealt with the whole “planning” of an entire extravaganza! For us it was April Fools-icious.
Moving to Ireland in July threw so many things into our lives, we had to move because of my husband’s work… Looking forward, it seemed like a huge adventure. We were newly married, newly coupled, new country, new everything! We were starting our lives together as a family. It could’ve been fabulous or absolutely horrendous, and I think if we weren’t the people that we are, this experience thus far could’ve been just that, horrendous. I’ll list the things that could’ve been bad:
1) We moved here in July 2006 and found that the laws of Ireland had changed regarding spouses of EU citizens. In May 2007 I was denied residency. I hadn’t been able to work up until then so we were a one income family…
2)I had a miscarriage in March 2007, followed by a second surgery on Easter Sunday (we’ve got a thing for holidays) . We suffered a second miscarriage in October 2007.
3)I haven’t been able to work since we moved here. I was finally granted permission to stay and work in Ireland in October of 2007, and my MFT license that I worked so hard to get doesn’t transfer over here.
4)We had some difficulties with our apartment, had to have an entire bathroom removed and the flooring in the guest bedroom. We had workmen in our apartment for about 2 months.
This all could have tainted my view of Ireland, but it hasn’t. At present, although I am able to work, I’ve chosen not to with the support of my AWESOME husband. How cool is that? I do have some down days, I don’t deny this, but ultimately, how f’n cool is it that I DONT HAVE TO WORK? If I was back in LA? I’d be working my ass off, everyday just going through the motions. Since we’ve been here, I’ve been able to take some classes, explore Ireland, explore myself, create an amazing home for my husband and I, learn my strengths and weaknesses within my relationship, come to terms with them, explore what I enjoy about myself, what I love about my relationship, challenge myself in ways I’ve never even imagined, expose myself to situations I might never have encountered in LA, moved away from my comfort zone, friends, family, etc., made new friends, started drawing and creating art, worked with Irish Asperger teenagers, dance to music while I iron, walk along the Irish sea, take public transport (I’d never do that in LA!), drive on the opposite side of the road, work out at a gym that looks like a nightclub, and ultimately I get to eat the absolutely puuuurfect breakfast, which starts my day every day! I don’t know if I would’ve have taken tea with milk for breakfast if I hadn’t lived in Ireland. I’d never even known about Barry’s tea until we moved here, and now, I bring it with me to LA when I go home. So…
Thank you Ireland. Thank you. I wouldn’t have noticed all the good in my situation if I hadn’t been thrown into something out of my ordinary, so I could create a new ordinary. Creating the ordinary in a new surrounding is a challenge…and I’ve done it. Thank you for showing me that I can.
February 15, 2008
Well, yesterday was Valentine’s day here in Ireland and my Main Man and I decided that from now on, Valentine’s day will be celebrated in our house by doing “something out of the ordinary”. I reminded my “main squeeze” that in like 20 years that means we’ll be sky diving for Valentine’s day, but hey…isn’t facing death together the most romantic way to say I LOVE YOU? At present, we decided to keep things small, and the out of the ordinary experience was…wait for it….meeting my lovely Man for lunch in the middle of a workday. In all the time we’ve been here, and I haven’t been working, we’ve never officially met for lunch. It was definitely something to look forward to, and something to break the monotany of his daily grueling grind. So…meet we did. Sadly, I’m now suffering from the world’s worst cold. I feel like someone has attached feather covered clothespins to the innards of my nose. That way they create blockage with a tickle. Not enough for a full sneeze, but just enough to make you want to bash your face against the pavement to stop the incessant discomfort. (Sidenote: I feel like this blog is “the trials and tribulations of my horrible health”, but damn…I can’t seem to catch a break. I was the kid who never got sick! I was the kid who purposely wet my hair and went outside on a cold day barefoot, in shorts and a tank top trying desperately to get sick so I could legitimately miss one test. This whole sick thing doesn’t sit well with me, and well, it’s just f’n balls! BTW, stool sample was normal and in the end it took 2 weeks for the results. Oh Ireland…)
When I arrived at the restaurant my absolutely cutest sweetest Main Man was just ahead of me parking, and pulled out a dozen red roses for me. Everyone in unison, Awwwwwwww. I got stares, and even one lady stopped her car as we crossed the road to make the Awwww face at me. It was sweet and unexpected, and they were absolutely beautiful. I had to make room at the table for my enormous floral bounty, which was silly fun. We had a very leisurely lunch and later the best guy ever picked up take away for dinner so I didn’t have to cook. Ultimately I think he feared that if I did, I might take the piping hot pan and bash it against my face to stop the incessant tickle in my nasal cavity. Actually, it’s just because he’s the greatest guy ever, and he loves me a bunch, and takes wonderful care of me when I’m well, and especially when I’m sick. I guess getting sick isn’t so bad now that I think of it…by the way, does anyone have some needle nose pliers they can loan me? I promise I’ll wash them off before I return them.